THE COMPLICATED GIRL

“Why wasn’t it me?” Carrie asked the love of her life right before he married another woman. “No, seriously. I really need to hear you say it. Come on, be a friend.” “I don’t know. It just got so hard… and she’s…” replied Mr. Big. “Yeah.”

I know it’s clichéd to quote “Sex and the City,” but it’s still so relevant. This episode revealed to girls like me what we’ve subconsciously known for a long time: We are the type of girls you should be with, but you don’t want to be with. Mr. Big was probably going to finish that statement with “easy.” Natasha, his soon-to-be wife, is easy — as in, she just goes with the flow. She doesn’t get angry or challenge him to be better. She nods and laughs and is always comfortable. She’s sweet and good-natured and lets him do whatever he wants. Carrie is complicated. She doesn’t put up with not getting everything she deserves. She craves more from Big. She has opinions and a life and dreams for the two of them together. She sometimes argues with him at inopportune times because she’s passionate and emotional, and she cares. Not that Natasha doesn’t care. But, she is a basic girl who wants to keep the peace at any cost, even if that means she put her needs aside. Her mind isn’t quite as analytical and imaginative as Carrie’s, so she can put up with more. She’s simple. I am not simple. I am a challenge for any man, I will admit. As hard as I try to be the simple girl, it is just not in my nature to be one. I demand more from everyone because I see great potential. I only want the best for myself and for my partner, so I will never just go along with some semblance of a mediocre, passionless relationship. An unevolved man or a boy will always want the simple girl. He doesn’t want to have to work hard for anything, especially not a relationship. He doesn’t want to be challenged or confronted.

But, a real man knows that by being with a complicated girl, he will be better for it. At times, this girl can be difficult, but he knows her intentions are good. With healthy communication, the relationship will become stronger. This is the type of girl you should marry. You may think it’s not what you want, but you want her. The easy girl will never satisfy you. She will be sweet but uninspiring. She will always leave you wanting more. Even stubborn Mr. Big came to realize he didn’t want it easy, and he ended up cheating on Natasha… with Carrie. Complicated girls are creative and, at times, emotional. She may also have a touch of what some people call “crazy” or “bitchy.” But, no one will love you better. No one will make love to you with as much passion. No one will encourage you to follow your dreams. You will have many deep conversations with her that make you question your beliefs and ideas. She will outsmart you on many occasions. It won’t always be easy, but it will be more satisfying and always entertaining. A simple girl has a simple mind. Things won’t be so hard when you are with this girl; it will be calm seas and smooth sailing. This is the type of girl you probably imagine yourself marrying, not the one who is opinionated and smart, who doesn’t always agree. But, if you want to be the best you can be and expand your mind and capabilities, marry the complicated girl.

Marry the girl who tells you exactly what she expects and follows through. Marry the girl who demands your respect. Marry the girl who can talk politics, even if her opinions are different from yours. Marry the girl whose eyes flicker with passion about a number of different subjects. Marry the girl who won’t let you get away with slacking on your talents. Marry the girl who pushes you to be better every day. Marry the girl with whom you sometimes fight. Marry the girl who is your equal or greater. My dad always says the thing that attracted him most to my mom was the fact that she was smarter than him. Only a real man can say that and know it’s good for him. Don’t get me wrong; a complicated girl who is not yet mature will be a pain in the ass. She will pick fights with you about everything, and you will always feel like a failure in her presence because you won’t know how to make her happy. But, with a little experience and wisdom, this is the girl who will become wife material. And, once she’s at that point, you better never let her get away, or you’ll risk losing the best thing you ever had.

 

Culled From Elite Daily

The Test Result

I have never been late before in my life except during my youth service when I was a week late, I wasn’t worried because I knew there was nothing to worry about. The doctor at the camp clinic said it might be a hormonal change or stress and it happens sometimes. But this time I was freaking out, I had a lot to be worried about. I and Jamal had been so carried away we forgot to use protection and I carelessly forgot about the morning after pill. I sat on the toilet seat praying the result will be negative, this was the second stick I was peeing on, as the first one fell inside the toilet because my hand were shaking so much. I came out and placed the stick it on the sink as I washed my hand. I had just gotten back from work where I hadn’t been myself all day. Jamal was out of town and he was due back that evening.

As I walked into the room to change out of my work clothes, there was a knock on the door, which was thrown open immediately after. Jamal stood there wearing a silly grin on his face, looking handsome but worn out. He had folded the sleeves of his white shirt and untucked it from his navy blue chinos pants. “Hi babe, I’ve missed you”, he said as he walked into the room and enveloped me in a warm hug. I had missed him too so I hugged him back. He kissed my forehead and gave me a probing look. “You look tired, he said”. I smiled and said to him, “you look tired too”. I had forgotten about the pregnancy pee stick on top of the sink, I was really happy to see him. “Well, I am coming straight from the airport, I had to see you, it’s been two weeks and you were all I have been thinking about”, he responded. Immediately he said that I remembered the stick on top of the sink. “Oh God! I whispered, I will be right back”, I said and made a dash for the bathroom.

She looked really tired Jamal thought as she followed Mimi behind as she dashed for the bathroom. It’s been two weeks since they saw and he had really missed her. He still had the ring she had rejected in his pocket. He knew she was being stubborn and he was going to get her to accept the proposal. He had never met someone like her before, she was stubborn, independent and sexy as hell. She tested his patience and kept him on his toes but he liked it, he didn’t like boring, that’s what most of his relationships had been. He wanted someone that will match him both mentally and otherwise and he just found it, the question now is how to convince this strong headed girl that he was the one for her.

Immediately he entered the bathroom, he saw her snatch something from the sink, he couldn’t tell what it was because she took it in a hurry, then his eyes went to the waste bin by the sink and he saw an empty carton of home pregnancy kit. His eyes moved from the empty carton to where I stood by the water closet. “Mimi, are you pregnant?” he asked. This was not how I planned this I thought, I wanted to know if I was first before I even told anyone and, he was the last person I planned on telling. Why did he just have to be everywhere, I thought. “I don’t know yet”, I just took the test before you entered and I haven’t gotten around to checking the result”, I answered. This was not the plan I had for myself, I wanted to further my career not have a baby, I wasn’t even married yet and here I was, probably pregnant. “Let’s look at the stick together then”, he suggested making me snap out of my thoughts. I nodded and he stepped closer as I raised the stick and held it properly so we can have a look at the what the outcome was. Two red lines flashed on both our faces, we looked at each other and down at the stick again. “Two lines means positive Jamal”, I said in a very low tone. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry and he drew me closer and brought his lips down on mine in a very possessive kiss. This wasn’t the response I expected I thought as I got carried away by the kiss.

The Other Side of The Story

I woke up the next morning and I felt like I stranger in my own body. The news I wasn’t meant to hear still made my heart hurt so much. I have never felt this way before and I hated this feeling. I didn’t know whether to confront Jamal with this or keep it to myself, I turned down his marriage proposal anyway, I guess my instinct wasn’t wrong after all. I didn’t feel like going anywhere, I just wanted to lay in bed all day eat ice cream and wallow in self-pity. I almost achieved this until my phone rang at 2pm and it was Jamal, I ignored his calls and he sent an SMS saying he knew I was home and he was coming over. I jumped out of the bed and ran to the bathroom to take a shower and freshen up, I felt like I was in a Hollywood movie, plus I didn’t want to look like something the cat dragged out the bed when he got here.

Jamal had gotten home the previous night to get a  message from Lola, saying that their plan worked. She had managed to say she was pregnant for him loud enough for Mimi to overhear and she was sure she did. At the party the previous night, Jamal had planned with Lola to make Mimi jealous, though Lola still had the hots for him, they had a fling in the past but they were really good friends now, all he needed to convince her to do it was agreeing to buy her a new pair of Louboutin court shoes. The initial plan  had been to do it upstairs but Mimi decided to leave before they could it, so when  Jamal saw her head for the elevator he had asked Lola to get her friend and follow closely behind. Since she acted like she really didn’t care and flirted around with Dennis like he wasn’t there, he was going to give her a taste of her own medicine. He had wanted to call her after he got Lola’s message but he decided to calm down and wait till the next day. He planned to call first thing in the morning to set things straight and let her know it was all an act but his mom came into town and family duty called. When he called her twice in the afternoon and she didn’t pick, he knew if he waited another minute to set things straight there might be real trouble. So he sent an SMS, hopped in his car and drove straight to hers without even waiting for her response.

I didn’t know whether to laugh or hit him. I was happy and angry at the same time. Here we were standing in the middle of my room, he hadn’t even waited for me to come downstairs. I just heard a knock on my door as I wore my light cotton stay at home dress, I hadn’t even combed my hair, I said come in thinking it was my aunt but what I saw was Jamal, first his head as he popped in and he said,”hello babe”, with a very mischevious look on his face and then the rest of his body as he pushed the door open and entered. His gaze went over my body and I saw the lust in his eyes. The dress was really light and I wasn’t wearing anything underneath. “Hi”, I said in a tone that was as cold as ice. “Easy there tiger”, he responded as he noticed my tone. I am here to explain and explain he did.

I could not believe my ears. I saw the hairbrush lying on the bed, my hand went straight to it and I flung it at him, he ducked and it hit the art hanging on the wall. I flung myself at him, attempting to scratch his eyes out, he held my hands and used his body to pin me against the wall. “You evil, son of a bitch”, I screamed at him. “Come on babe, you were the one playing games with me”, he responded not attempting to release me. “You turn down my proposal and tell me to give you time to think, I really don’t know what you want to think about cos I know you love, then your rub some guy on my face”, he continued. “You really don’t wanna know how it hurt, cos it did”. I stopped struggling and looked up at him. There was this hurt look in his eyes and it dawned on me that I really did  hurt. As I stopped struggling, we both noticed the awkwardness of our position, his whole body pressed against my light clad body and I felt his arousal. “Really”, I said, as I looked down his pants and looked up at him. His face broke into a smile and he replied, “well, I can’t help the way you make me feel.Then he lifted me up and headed for my bed, forgetting that my aunt was right downstairs.

 

HeartBroken: Wrong Place, Right Time

I got back from Abuja after Chisom’s wedding with the get married feeling weighing me down. The ceremony was lovely, I could see they both really loved reached other and I wanted something like they had. The truth is I didn’t really know if Jamal loved me as much as he claimed. I had not accepted his proposal, I told him it was so sudden and I wanted to think about it, though he was not happy and my aunt was mad at me, I just needed to be sure. I have known him for just a few months and even though the sex was awesome and I loved him, I still had some reservations, plus he was my boss.

I  made plans to hook up with Dennis my really old but good friend, we had done our masters together back in the UK and he was back in town for his sister’s wedding. He had invited me to come for a pre-wedding party at Mason Fahrenheit in VI and I was super excited. I was going with Dammie and I knew she will be at mine in a few minutes. I quickly went into the bathroom, took a shower and went to my wardrobe to look for what to wear. Few minutes later I was all dressed up in a long spaghetti strap black dress and a silver flat sandals. I did my makeup and as I put on my red Mac matte lipstick, which I have been taking extra care to make sure it doesn’t finish, as Mac products had skyrocketed with dollar exchange rate. I was just putting on some perfume when Dammie called to tell me she was downstairs. I grabbed my purse and went out to meet her.

We arrived at the party and it was already in full swing, Dennis was looking dashing as usual and Dammie was drooling. “He is such a player you know”, I whispered to Dammie, “I wouldn’t want you to get your heart broken”. Meanwhile, Dennis was all over me, “you look so different”, he said, “you have added some weight here and there and I like it”. “You will not change Mr”, I retorted, “come and introduce me to your sister joor”, I continued as I dragged him towards where some members of his family stood. He put his hands around my waist as we played around, then I saw a familiar figure step out of the elevator and as our eyes met, he frowned as he noticed the arms around me. “Damn! does he know everyone?” I thought.

Jamal had not expected to see her here, after she turned down his proposal and said she needed time to think, he has been trying very had to give her all the time and space she needed, now here she was with playboy Dennis drooling all over her and looking like he was going to have her for dinner. He didn’t even know they knew each other. He tried to control his jealousy as he headed towards them, “hi baby, he said, as he got to where they stood”. Dennis immediately took his hand away from my waist immediately Jamal said those words. “Hey J, he greeted as he looked from I to Jamal, I didn’t know you knew Mimi”. “Dennis, he said, as he brought out his hand for a handshake, I see you know my girlfriend”. “Really, you finally caught the ice queen herself”, Dennis said as his eyes widened in amazement at Jamal’s term, “my girlfriend”. “The ice queen huh”, Jamal said. “Yes, Dennis responded, she turned down every guy that asked her out back in the UK when we were doing our masters”. They both carried on as if I wasn’t there. Then Jamal turned to me and looked me up and down, “you look gorgeous”, he said with that knowing look I can never forget. “Thanks, I replied”. “I am going to say hi to the bride to be”, he said as he strolled across the room. I was surprised the hang around.

Jamal has planned that since she was playing him like this, he was going to make her jealous, immediately he saw her as he got off the Elevator. He decided to spend the whole evening dotting on the bride’s best friend Lola, who had the hots for him. They will stand so close to each other and Jamal and Jamal will throw a glance over if I was looking. I could not believe what was going on, I was so red with jealousy. Who was the girl hanging all over Jamal and he was even playing along, I thought. They had been at it for more than thirty minutes and I couldn’t take it anymore. I was so angry I decided to go downstairs to get some air, I walked straight to the elevator and pressed the button, as I stepped in I saw Jamal heading towards me. He managed to get in before the doors shut. “Where are you going”, he asked? and that was all I needed to burst. “Who was that?” I screamed at him, “hanging all over you and both of you were all over each other”.”Well, you said you didn’t want me, I didn’t think you would care”, he replied in a very curt manner. The elevator doors opened and I stepped out not bothering to check if he was following.

As we stepped outside the hotel, he reached out and grabbed my hand, I turned to face him, he drew me closer and brought his lips down on mine. It’s been long since we kissed and I missed him, I was mad at him at the same time. We kissed like we hadn’t seen each other in months. When we drew apart, he said, ” I don’t what you want me to do to convince you that I love you,  but you really need to make up your mind soon, I am not that patient and he walked away. Leaving me thinking of how I wanted to be his wife so badly, and how I was really stupid not to say yes to his proposal. I was lost in thoughts when two ladies walked past, I noticed one of them as the one that had been all over Jamal, I froze when I hear her say to her friend, “I went to the doctor finally, I am three months pregnant and I think it’s Jamal’s”. I felt shivers all over my body and I couldn’t move for a few seconds.

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

“Surprise! A very familiar voice called immediately I stepped into the compound that evening, I was very tired, all I wanted to do was fall in bed and sleep. Though it was my birthday, I didn’t feel like celebrating, all I wanted was a large bowl of vanilla ice cream, a cold shower, and my bed. I had kept it quiet at the office cause I didn’t want anybody making a fuss or anything. Chisom was on leave, she had taken some day to travel to meet her fiance to make traditional wedding plans. Since our fight, I hadn’t seen Jamal, I learned he traveled out of the country for a bit but he still sent me messages every morning and wished me goodnight every night even though I ignored him and never bothered to respond to the messages.

Jamal stepped out of from behind the gift wrapped Red Ford Explorer SUV packed in front of the house, my aunt and my uncle followed him closely behind as they sang happy birthday to me together. I was astonished, I didn’t know what I was feeling, I had hoped the day will just go by uneventful or so I thought. They finished singing the song and my aunt enveloped me in a bear hug. As she stepped aside, Jamal came closer and whispered in my ears, “happy birthday love, I hope you know I am not going anywhere”, and then he handed the car keys to me. I couldn’t believe it, the car was for me. I screamed and ran to where the car was parked, I didn’t so much about cars but that looked like the latest model Ford Explorer. I looked from my aunt to my uncle, then Jamal, who had that handsomely evil glint in his eyes. ” Is this really mine?  I asked. “Yes, it’s your Jamal responded and I am yours too if you will have me, he continued as he went  down on one knee, brought out the  red jewelry box from his pocket and opened it to reveal the most beautiful diamond ring, I had even seen. ” WILL YOU MARRY ME, MY FIESTY RUNNER”? , he asked. There, I got the marriage proposal I didn’t even know I wanted so much and I had no clue what to say.

Trouble in Paradise

As we stepped outside and got to the car park, I snatched my arms from his grip but before I could open my mouth to tell him what I thought about his behavior, his mouth claimed mine in a kiss I knew was meant to shut me up for a bit.In a matter of a second, the kiss that was meant to be a quick way of shutting me up turned to something else. Get a hold of yourself Mimi, I told myself, he is such a devil’s incarnate. I pushed him away but not before I noticed the bulge on his trouser and for a moment my eyes lingered. Jamal only wanted to shut her up but he should have known there was nothing like a quick kiss where she was concerned, the little witch has managed to wrap him round her finger.

“You are so infuriating”, I screamed after I managed to drag my eyes up to look at his face with that devilish smile on his lips. “I hate you, you can’t just walk into my life and turn everything upside down”, I can’t even listen to the lyrics of a song without thinking of you”, I continued. “You are my boss, we are not supposed to be doing this, this is not right and I am not going to do it anymore”. I was saying the truth, Jamal had come into my life and totally changed everything, the more I kept trying to push him away, the more he pushed back. I hated how much he made me feel. “So quit then”, I heard. I snapped out of my thoughts to look at him, maybe I didn’t here right. “Quit Mimi, yes I said it….You don’t have to work for me, we could get you another job somewhere, you are good at your job and with my help, we could find you some place good”, he said. “I am tired of you fighting me, fighting this…I know you feel for me the same way I fee about you, you make me crazy, I threw my work code out the window the moment I met you”, he continued. He came closer and drew me closer to him, do you think you are the only one that knows what we are doing is wrong? But the thought of letting you go is killing…I won’t do that. I could not believe what I was hearing, he wanted me to give up my job. I turned and I started walking away from him. Jamal knew it was going to be hard to convince her to give up her job but he wasn’t ready to lose her just yet.

I opened my phone as I walked close to the entrance and ordered an Uber before Jamal caught up with me. “Where are you going?” he asked. “Home”, I said in a very cold tone. This has gotten bad really fast Jamal thought. He knew she was not going to listen to whatever he was going to say, so he just decided to stand with her till her Uber arrived. The driver stopped in front of the entrance, as I walked to the car, Jamal grabbed my arm and said, I will never hurt you, Mimi, I care about you too deeply to, I just want us to work this out…I know we can make us work. I loosened his grip and walked towards my Uber. All the way home I wondered what the heck I was going to do. I got myself into this mess and I need to find a way to get myself out of it.

 

Pictures From Yudala Zero Gravity – Lagos

Yudala Zero Gravity – a multi-city digital entertainment concert powered by composite e-commerce outfit Yudala – kicked off with a mega music blast at the Landmark Centre, Oniru on Sunday October 2, with a  host of superstar artistes on hand to thrill the audience including Olamide, Naeto C, Sound Sultan, Humblesmith, Zoro and an eye-catching performance from fast-rising act, David Grey.

Here are some Images from the event:

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Yudala CEO, Prince Nnamdi Ekeh with Dance Crew
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Stanley Leo Ekeh welcoming guests at the event

 

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David Grey with SoundCity Presenter

 

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Naeto C with MTV Presenter

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MTV Base presenter and Humble Smith
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Guests on the Red Carpet

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Ali Baba thrilling Guests

Pictures of artists during their performance.

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Zoro thrilling the crowd with his amazing dance steps.
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Talented crooner Sound Sultan gave an awesome performance.
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Olamide stole the show

The Yudala Zero Gravity trains moves on to the city of Abuja with talented rapper Phyno headlining the  Contemporary Music Blast on October 21st and a Rock Gospel Concert on October 22nd while the city of Enugu headlined by the king of highlife Flavour N’abania  will rock on November 5th and 6th with a Contemporary Music Blast and Rock Gospel Concert respectively.